Unpopular opinion: If you're angry you still care....unmasking anger in your healing journey
This week a popular topic amongst the collective has been processing big emotions like anger and rage, so let's unpack and unmask anger.
I tend to tell people that anger is a part of us that loves us the most because anger is typically a secondary emotion and a response to physical/emotional pain.
When we say secondary emotion what that means is that anger masks as our response to a much deeper like:
*Rejection
*Fear
*Anxiety
*Frustration
*Jealousy
*Shame
*Embarrassment
*Humiliation
*Sadness
*Hurt
*Betrayal
*Inadequacy
When unmasking your anger awareness of how it manifests for you is a must. Do you express your anger outwardly or inwardly?
Outward Anger:
*Swearing at people
*Shouting/Yelling
*Verbal Abuse (name calling/berating)
*Throwing/breaking things
*Physical abuse
*Resentful towards others and situations
*Lack of self-control
Inward Anger:
*Negative self talk
*Self-isolation
*Feeling overwhelmed
*Anxiety
*Easily irritated
*Denying yourself of things
Physical Manifestations of Anger in the Body:
*Tense muscles
*Gritting teeth/clenching jaw
*Increased body temperature
*Elevated blood pressure
*Increased Heart Rate
*Changes in your breathing
*Sweating
*Clenched fists
Anger can trigger our "fight or flight", so if you haven't ever had an awareness of how fight or flight manifests in your physical body knows a good time to dive in and really get to know yourself, your body and your energy. You can't change what you aren't aware of.
So how do we begin to unpack our own anger? One of the best strategies for getting to the "root" of something, is to go backwards to go forwards. You want to go back to your first memory of when you consciously remember experiencing the true emotion of your anger.
*What was that experience?
*What do you remember experiencing emotionally?
*How did you feel?
*What did you do differently to avoid feeling or experiencing that?
*How did that ripple throughout your life?
*How did that effect your relationships throughout your life?
This is just a starting point and for those looking for more, shadow work is an amazing place to really get to the root of your wounds and facilitate true healing. When unpacking anything in our healing journeys, the only way out is through. And unpopular opinion (don't shoot the messenger), if you're still angry about a situation, deep down you still care, and your anger is leading you back to explore something deeper that still needs to be healed and reintegrated.